We love those who we think will love us in return. That’s just common sense. That’s the way we form friendships. That’s the way we seek romantic partners. We look for those with whom it will be safe to open up, those on whom it will be safe to bestow our love, those who will not turn on us or betray us. Our kind of love thus springs in no small part from the fear of being hurt.

But that is not the way God loves. No, God sets His love on those He knows will hurt Him, on His enemies (5:10), on rebellious sinners (5:8). In fact, although in our search for safety we would be hesitant to die even for those who love us the most (5:7), Jesus chose to die for ungodly people, for those who reject His authority (5:6).

And that’s why God’s love is so much more reliable than ours. For let’s face it – when we choose to love in our very conditional way, we have to expect only the same sort of fearful, conditional love in return. For if we so easily withdraw our love from someone who hurts us, we have to wonder if our beloved will do the same thing, abandoning us if he or she discovers the shameful, hurtful things we have done. Our guilt thus leads us to hide parts of our lives even from those we love the most, fearful as we are that they would walk out on us if they really knew everything about us.

But God already knows the worst about each and every one of us. And the Father still gave up His Son for sinners like us. And Jesus was still willing to die for sinners like us. And God is even willing to pour His love into our sinful hearts in the Person of His Holy Spirit (5:5), healing our greatest brokenness, cleansing us even of our deepest shame, and renewing us from the inside out.

Yes, it’s only God’s unconditional, self-sacrificial love that will never give up, that will never waver or falter. Surely that kind of love is worthy of our trust, worthy of our love in return.

Romans 5:1-11 (ESV)

Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ.
2 Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God.
3 Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance,
4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope,
5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
6 For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.
7 For one will scarcely die for a righteous person– though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die–
8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
9 Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God.
10 For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God by the death of his Son, much more, now that we are reconciled, shall we be saved by his life.
11 More than that, we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation.