It always hurts to say goodbye to those you love, whether it be sending a child off to college, a friend to a job opportunity in another state, or a grandparent to a nursing home. And sometimes we have to release a loved one to death itself. How do we deal with the departures that come our way all too often?

Jonathan gives us a clue in verse 22, when he commented that it was God who had sent David away from him. Now, to be sure, his father’s irrational paranoia and jealous rage were the immediate reasons David had to flee, so it would have been easy for Jonathan and David to become bitter at King Saul as a result. Instead, the two friends rested in the knowledge that, even though they could not control the sometimes crazy circumstances of life, God can.

And in fact, God’s sovereign power is demonstrated in these very passages. Knowing how suspicious his father could be, Jonathan developed an elaborate ruse that would have allowed him to let David know the results of his interview with King Saul. But it turned out that the ruse was unnecessary – when the time came to let David know that Saul was indeed out for his blood, there wasn’t anyone around. Yes, it was part of God’s plan for David to run away, but God also made it possible for the two friends to say their goodbyes in person.

And knowing that God is in charge of everything leads to the second great comfort Jonathan found in verse 42 – the certainty that God would be with both friends, even though they were apart. The two friends had made an oath swearing that God would be “between” them. By this, they didn’t mean that God was separating them, but that He was right with them, among them, as if He had an arm around each one’s shoulders. Because they knew that God is all powerful, and because they knew God is everywhere, they could be confident that God would be with both of them, no matter how physically distant they might have had to be.

And we New Testament Christians can draw even greater comfort from this fact. For we know that Christ is present with all who trust in Him in the person of His Holy Spirit. That means that the closer we are to Christ, the closer we are to all the other Christians whom we love, no matter how separated we might be from them in space or time. For all who trust in Him are part of His one body. And when He returns to rule the world in power and glory, we will all be reunited forever.

So, if you have to let someone go, trust God’s good and perfect will for him or her. And remember that, in Christ, we really don’t say “goodbye.” Instead, it’s just “See you later.”

I Samuel 20:18-23, 35-42 (ESV)

18 Then Jonathan said to him, “Tomorrow is the new moon, and you will be missed, because your seat will be empty.
19 On the third day go down quickly to the place where you hid yourself when the matter was in hand, and remain beside the stone heap.
20 And I will shoot three arrows to the side of it, as though I shot at a mark.
21 And behold, I will send the boy, saying, ‘Go, find the arrows.’ If I say to the boy, ‘Look, the arrows are on this side of you, take them,’ then you are to come, for, as the LORD lives, it is safe for you and there is no danger.
22 But if I say to the youth, ‘Look, the arrows are beyond you,’ then go, for the LORD has sent you away.
23 And as for the matter of which you and I have spoken, behold, the LORD is between you and me forever.”

35 In the morning Jonathan went out into the field to the appointment with David, and with him a little boy.
36 And he said to his boy, “Run and find the arrows that I shoot.” As the boy ran, he shot an arrow beyond him.
37 And when the boy came to the place of the arrow that Jonathan had shot, Jonathan called after the boy and said, “Is not the arrow beyond you?”
38 And Jonathan called after the boy, “Hurry! Be quick! Do not stay!” So Jonathan’s boy gathered up the arrows and came to his master.
39 But the boy knew nothing. Only Jonathan and David knew the matter.
40 And Jonathan gave his weapons to his boy and said to him, “Go and carry them to the city.”
41 And as soon as the boy had gone, David rose from beside the stone heap and fell on his face to the ground and bowed three times. And they kissed one another and wept with one another, David weeping the most.
42 Then Jonathan said to David, “Go in peace, because we have sworn both of us in the name of the LORD, saying, ‘The LORD shall be between me and you, and between my offspring and your offspring, forever.'” And he rose and departed, and Jonathan went into the city.